Reverend Hotfeet

Do you know where your Pastor is tonight? Ordinarily, family values wingnut preachers , well, value sticking around their families. Not so this guy. But he’s got an ironclad excuse, one that fellow Religious Right Wingers ought to find plausible and sympathetic .

"The pastor of a Hammond church who mysteriously vanished in 1980 in what was described as an abduction by a satanic cult has been rediscovered as an Arkansas mayor."

"Don LaRose admitted to newspaper reporters Tuesday he left his wife and two daughters behind in Hammond. He said he fled because he was about to be abducted by a group of shadowy figures who had kidnapped him in New York five years earlier."

Well, who wouldn’t hi-tail in out of there when shadowy figures figure into things. And of course he couldn’t tell his wife and children cause the nightcrawlers might have them bugged or something.

But never mind, he landed square on his feet.

"LaRose has gone by the fake name Ken Williams for 27 years, and maintains a talk-radio show, a new marriage and has served as the mayor of Centerton, Ark., since 2001."

Well at least he made another family, so he can’t be all bad.

“He seemed to be a great man, with integrity, honesty, a good rapport, he loved people, good communicator,” said Lee Roy Floyd, the janitor at the church and a 45-year member of its Deacon Board. “You think, good gracious, this is a good find.”

In other words a typical Republican.

And those sneaky devil dog Satanists , now you see ‘em now you don’t.

"The day before he disappeared, he was speaking to a group in the church, and in the middle of his sermon he stopped talking and looked at the back of the room. No one who turned around saw anything, but LaRose later claimed he had seen one of the Satanists through a window."

“And the next day he left. He was gone"